I SINCERELY APOLOGISE MA'AM (AS IN "BARM" )

Do you see how easy it is to apologise, dearest teacher?

Now. If you apologise for treating me like I am a piece of shit, and for letting your family and friends down, I will consider allowing you to help me to bring down this shower of shit that has ruled us for centuries and sent us into wars engineered for their benefit.

But until then I cannot believe a word you say.

You can, like Henry Kissinger and David Rockefeller, still smile and smile and be a villain.

Or you and your family can put behind you your upper middle class, your private education and help those of us from the gutter who your type have used and considered your servants from our birth.

Or is that too much to ask?

Are we, the working class, expected to serve you in this, your hour of need?

But always remember: while you and your lot were happily shagging away, I worked my way into a position in which I am years, if not decades, in advance...

All I asked was your assistance.

But you denied it?!

But as always, I humbly accept that if you so much as glance at me then it is an honour for me, and I will carry such an honour to my grave. After all, I and millions like me are here to serve you, your family and your ilk. That is what we are here for. To serve you. To fight for you. And to serve you. Not us. To serve you, and you alone, your Majesty.

Please accept my apologies for trying to help you in this desperate hour.

And if you and your family want to treat me like I am a piece of shit then, because I from the working class, I accept your decision with great joy, cap in hand, and hope to serve you in a much better way, one in which you survive and become the hero of the working class, while I succumb to the violence and stress of this struggle.

I am here to serve you and you alone, Ma'am (as in "barm").

PS who the fuck do you and your family think you are?