WHAT DOES A BANKER LOOK LIKE?

WHAT DOES A BANKER LOOK LIKE?

Let’s ask David Attenborough.

David, we have recently bailed out, to the tune of £500 billion, a sub-species of the human race called “the banker”, but we have yet to see one show some humility on TV or radio to at least thank us and explain how they fucked up big time. What does a banker look like?

David: Well, here in the jungle of The City of London, the normally shy and retiring banker can still be found in his usual watering holes getting pissed on champagne and going to lap dancing clubs for some light entertainment…at your expense. This intelligent but evil creature has no desire to be seen in public, particularly at times like these during which he can screw the human race for hundreds of billions while hundreds of thousands of malnourished dehydrated kids die every year of despair, hunger, thirst, and very easily curable diseases. They can frequently be heard laughing and saying to each other, “fuck ‘em, the morons”, but one has to listen very carefully to filter out this mating call from the noise and din of the jungle which he calls home, The City of London.